Before Week One

[written at 2236 hours on an exhausted Wednesday night]

It's day two of school, and I already feel like God is stirring my heart in directions it has never been stirred, more so than day one, even. Every worship session there is something God reveals about Himself that I didn't know before, and things about myself that held me back from worshiping Him in purity. Every word spoken on the platform is a word worth remembering.

Particularly today, I really felt Him showing me a prideful area of my worshiping heart that prevented its full potential. I was afraid to shout and dance crazily, out of fear of what other's thought of me. In a room full of 1400+ hungry God-lovers, I don't know why I was so caught up in that, honestly. But at the end of the day, I was, and the Holy Spirit was so kind in showing that part of me and telling me I was better than that. Today was the day that spirit of pride and fear of man was broken off; I believe it in Jesus' name.  As we shouted 'with reckless abandon' to the God who was and is to come; as we gave Him our highest praise, literally, I felt the fear fall off of me. Because when we shouted that loud, we silenced the voices of the lies inside our minds. I couldn't hear those lies anymore, all I could hear was the smile and laughter of God the Father. I am not kidding; we shouted louder than we had ever shouted before, danced harder than we had ever danced before, just like David did, and it felt so good. It was liberating. We were worshiping in the freedom given to us by the kindness of the Father who loves us.

The rest?

Overwhelming. Undoubtedly overwhelming.

I'm honestly still trying to wrap my head around all the concepts Kris and Bill talked about yesterday, let alone what was shared today. It was a long day, but it was good. God was good, and He continues to be, always.

I do believe in rhythm: the tempo to which our heart, mind, body, and soul harmonise together to produce what is to be the journey of First Year. The rhythms will pick up, but our hearts will always be attuned to the heart and voice of the Father, not in the past, but in the now, the present reality.

My body is tired, my mind is overwhelmed with knowledge, but my heart and my spirit are fully alive.

from a different perspective,

CITRA